Another Step for Equality

28 12 2012

Right this very minute it is midnight in Maine. Right this very minute couples are getting ready to be married – Same Sex couples no less. It gives me chills. This next Tuesday the new law goes into effect in Maryland as well. 1/5th of our states now recognize marriage for ALL couples – that is 10 out of 50 states. It is very exciting indeed.

I hate to always harp on the same thing – but I often find myself going back mentally to how far I have come in my beliefs of equality. I used to be such a bigot. I never considered it a Civil rights issue – only a moral one. I felt these people were disobeying God himself – so why should they receive the privilege of marriage. It should be upheld for those of us who were obeying the heavenly Father and living a moral life. What a farce – it is just still so embarrassing to me that I thought that way. So, prideful and high and mighty – considering myself so much more moral simply because I was born straight. I know I have apologized – but I must do it just one more time. I want to apologize for all of the people who have hurt you – openly and behind your back. All of the people who have considered themselves closer to God – more in sync with Him – simply because of who you love.

I feel like I want to write the exact words that would get the religious right’s attention. I feel a burden to do so. Yet, I know realistically that until they are ready within themselves to receive the truth, my words are not going to matter. I will put my energy into something that can be useful. I will hug the brokenhearted, I will be an adopted parent to those who are parentless, I will love as much as I can and continue to speak up and share my story with any who want to hear it.

I will rejoice – rejoice right now with the couples who have been waiting many years for the chance to publicly embrace the one they love. People who have paid taxes just like all of the straight citizens have all of their adult lives now have a civil right that the rest of us have taken for granted. It is a thing to rejoice and be happy about. One day at a time, one state at a time, one couple at a time.


Prodigal Son

20 12 2012

My son is home for Christmas! He moved to the east last September. He left a hole here – sometimes it feels as big as the Grand Canyon. We have done pretty well of adapting to life with him gone. We have “moved on” as much as a family can when a member moves away. We have fallen into a new swing of things, but he was missed, every day.

Yet, there is always a joy at seeing someone you love blossom and bloom and follow their dreams. We are happy for him as well. I do not love my son more than my daughters, but as all mom’s know – there a special and unique bond with each child. My son is the most like me of my three children. He is often loud and can be dogmatic at getting his point across. Yes – I can own up to that. Two people who way can butt heads – and we have plenty! Of all of my children, my son caused me to grow the most. If you met my girls – you would understand – they are much more compliant, in fact, they do a pretty good job of parenting themselves. They have an inherit gene to watch how things are to be done and then to do them that way. They get that from my husband.

When I was growing up, I was the difficult child in our family. I was just plain awful most of the time. I rebelled at every chance I was given – just give me a rule and I would find a way to break it. I can still remember my Mama saying, “One day you will have a kid just like you – and then you will understand!”, in exasperation. I exhausted her. I didn’t have a kid like me – I had a kid 100 times more rebellious than I was. Imagine… Karma I suppose!

I love this kid so much though, and am so grateful for all of the things I was forced to face about myself as a person through parenting him. I have a friend, Bob, who says, “Our children force us to face our own issues”. That has been true for me through the years. I had to overcome my own fear of homosexuality – and that was a big one. I didn’t know it was a fear at the time, I truly just thought I was following the Bible. Now, that I have done the research and realize the bible’s original meaning in these “bashing scriptures” we all hear, I now know the bible was just an excuse so I didn’t have to face my fear of something or someone “different” in a way I did not understand.

I am so grateful for the growth I have had over the years because of having the blessing of being Jake’s mom. I can tell my growing isn’t over since he is talking of moving to a foreign country – one where they do not protect LBGT people with their laws and in fact they are often killed. I can not imagine my life without this kid in it – yet he isn’t a kid anymore. Somehow since September, he became a man. It isn’t my decision anymore – it is his – and I will just keep growing I suppose… and continuing to let go.


Marriage Equality

10 12 2012

I am sure you know that marriage equality was passed in several states in November. These all have different dates that they come into play. For Washington State, it was this past weekend. Many places staffed their courthouses beginning at midnight. Couples lined up for hours to get their licenses. The images and stories were so touching. The picture that stuck with me the most was of a Sunday morning service at Seattle’s First Baptist Church. Twenty five same-sex couples were wed that morning.

As a Christian who is for Marriage Equality, it often feels it is an uphill battle and that we are a voice that isn’t heard over all of the louder, more prevalent voices in the Faith communities. It can feel discouraging. I think sometimes when you are in the middle of the fight, it is hard to have a good perspective of the big picture. I meet people of faith all the time with a similar story to mine. A story of transition and change for the better. I truly believe that we will see the day that marriage equality is accepted nationwide. I feel so hopeful for what the future holds!!!




2 12 2012

I may be weird – but I do feel like I get called on “missions”. Not really the “Mission Impossible” exciting kind of missions – but things that just seem to seep into my very being and won’t let me go until I do something about it.

I feel strongly about speaking out as a mom of a bisexual kid – but I also feel compelled through our PFLAG Bozeman/GV work. I have been doing those things for a while now and still find them very energy giving, but I have recently been called in a different direction. I have blogged before about my grief over how Christians treat LGBT people, being a Christian myself. I often even find myself hesitant to speak out and say I am a Christian – I generally say “I am a follower of Christ” or “I am a progressive Christian”. I really feel strongly that there is so much misinformation and confusion out there in our churches about the LGBT community. Most Christians do not even realize that Jesus said nothing about homosexuality, I didn’t for most of my life. I want to be a part of the change. I see it starting to happen, in many denominations and it is exciting. We need more people to hear the truth. I want to stand in that gap between the truth about LGBT people and the church.

So, I have been feeling this way for a while now, but wasn’t really sure how to go about it or where to start. I have opened up the conversation and will be doing some PFLAG Faith work  at my own church – but my vision is bigger than that. Well, just as God sent Aaron to Moses – He has sent me a cohort!! A woman who found my blog in internet land – and we live in the same town! Coincidence? I think not! She has the same vision. Our stories are similar – she is even from Texas! Could it be that God put us both right here in this town, right now at this time to begin the work He wants to do here?

I am super excited and honored and scared, but mostly excited! We had a face to face meeting recently, she asked me to coffee, me not having a clue why – and what a wonderful surprise it all turned out to be. I do not even know if she really knew why she asked me, just that she knew we needed to get together. When we were finished and putting on our coats it was all just really starting to sink in. I asked her, “are you and an organized, detailed person by chance?” She replied, “Yes!” See – God does send us exactly what we need when we need it, because those are big weaknesses of mine! OH MY – you should pray for my new friend, because I am probably going to drive her batty with my lack of attention to details. Even still, somehow I feel we will make an amazing team! This town may not know what has hit them!